new perspective, new view.. I'm immensely happy and proud of you, respect..

God has been good, not just to me..

please see it..

thank you.. your life and events have been a thorough affirmation for me, an insight to His glory and love that I really need to see again for myself

all the best

-Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know
each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
— Lynnette, age 8

yes, us men have emotions too.. after awhile, something needs to come out... let it out to God..

but even if there's noone who bothers to listen to you, what's the point...

even when i find solace in God..

i can't find solace in the group..

even when i find security in God..

I can't find security in the group..

even when i sensitize myself to God..

i can't desensitize myself to the group...

is this supposed to be right? i don't feel like it is..

i don't know why..

my mind is in a mess..

there's something wrong.. i lost confidence, i lost self-esteem, i seem to lose any shred of hope i have of myself..

the strange thing is, i know it's wrong..

but why am i not doing anything about it? where's my willpower? where's God's voice telling me what/how i should be doing about it?

where's my self-consciousness ?

i'm feeling distant even towards myself.. i don't seem to get what's in me or in my head.. i seem, different, even to myself..

where am i heading to?

WHO can i turn to?

precisely.. WHO?

God, so i kneel before You.. it's just You and me, my heart and soul and spirit..

no sorry, it's not even about me..

God, so i kneel before You.. YOU shall show me and tell me..

YOU alone shall be my answer..

The best way of removing negativity is to laugh and be joyous.

-David Icke

because..

a third of me wants to tell..

a third of me can't bring myself to tell..

the last third of me is just indifferent..

"Another interesting characteristic of children is that they have no problems asking or receiving. Their general nature is a trusting nature. They're so strong in it, it becomes a boldness that is remarkable. They have no hesitation, because they know the giving, loving nature of their parents. Their parents love them and want to give to them.

God wants His children to be like that. He desires them to be so secure in His presence that they come freely to Him in total confidence, knowing that as their Father, He will care for them in every area of their lives. He wants them to have faith that He will give to them and provide for their needs."

-Effective Fervent Prayer by Mary Alice Isleib-

how awesome and amazing!

slightly less than a month left..

am i prepared? not exactly sure.. it's been almost since i last picked up my physics text to read.. and now i'm gonna face more physics for the next 4 years, not exactly sure if i'm gonna enjoy or be bored by it..

but at least God has been kind to open doors wherever i go.. i guess if this is the way to go, then i should be at least happy about this decision..nothing much i can do about it anyway, so i'm just gonna take a big step forward and do the best i can...

CHIONG AH

"Drinking beer is easy. Trashing your hotel room is easy. But being a Christian, that's a tough call. That's real rebellion!"

" Yeah, well, it was funny. If was like, you know... When I did take the cure for alcohol, which by the way was not a cure, it was a healing. I came out of the hospital never, ever being tempted by a drink, never, ever being like in the least bit, under the worst stress, ever thinking about taking a drink, never went to AA. Everybody's sitting there going, "Wow, what great willpower." I have no willpower. I came out and it was a total... It was a healing. My dad was a pastor, my grandad was a pastor, my wife's father is a pastor, and I'm Christian now. It was a... people say, "There are no miracles," and I go, "Oh, yes there are." I'm a walking miracle because I was the worst alcoholic you could imagine, and 24 years I haven't had, not a drop."

-Alice Cooper (wikipedia)

yale asked: what's my meaning in life..

chim no? I haven't really thought about it actually, like really sat down to think about it..
the question caught me by surprise, because I think, it's time that I actually thought about it, like seriously..

I guess for me, most importantly is to live a contented life.. I have dreams and passion, I work towards my dreams and passions, but I don't want to get sucked into the endless cycle of work and life.. I guess I've been blessed much by God to be able to live so comfortably and contented with the blessings He has given.. what better family can I have? what better friends can I ask for? what better dreams and passions and opportunities can I hope for?

I don't have big dreams or aspirations.. people say to chase your dreams and be ambitious, but I'm not one to go all out.. Not that I don't strive to achieve or do my best.. But everytime I look back at my past, I feel contented at how everything has unfolded..

To me, I try to just be appreciative at what God has done and is doing in my life... and perhaps to make the world a better and happier place to live in for the people around me.. it doesn't matter if certain things don't work out the way I want or hope for, sometimes I fail, whether be it studies, work, family, relationships.. but I look forward to what tomorrow brings, and I'm happy to have reached so far ahead in life..

What makes me happy and contented is probably much of seeing the people around me are happy and contented as well.. spreading the joy, sharing the pains, fighting the sorrows, whatever it takes to make people cheer up.. my sadness is not worth other people's happiness, and as much as I can, I tend to keep my emotions to myself so that I can share in other people's happiness.. and seeing them happy helps me to get myself back on my feet, and to realise what joy and contentment really means to me..

So, have I answered the question? maybe, maybe not.. but at least now I know what I really look forward to in my life, and what really matters to me probably..